About 19th December 09, One night in station.
Hari yang melelahkan.
Angin, aku titip salam untuk ksatria ku lewat alunan angin dari mobil angkutan yang membawaku ke kampus. –gak romantic. Coba dari pantai atau gunung- yang tidak pernah bisa menggantarkanku ke tempat ini.
Pasti telat. Angkutan ini seperti merayap!. Padahal kuliah pasti sudah dimulai. Tiba-tiba HP-ku berdering, Ah, Miss.. Dosen satu ini emang istimewa, baru telat udah ditelpon
“Where are you girl? Class will be started soon”
“Yeah, sorry miss. I’m on the way now. May be I’ll come late”. Klik, terputus.
Kuliah yang membosankan. Aku ingin tempat ini bukan hanya soal absensi. Lalu duduk di atas kursi kayu dan menjadi penonton. Aku ingin mendapat banyak ilmu. Tempat mengeluarkan semua isi otak ku sekaligus mengetahui isi otak orang lain tentang pelbagai hal dan tempat melepaskan hasrat masa mudaku.
Berhenti. Akhirnya.
Aku berjalan diatas trotoar yang sepanjang jalannya adalah street food courts yang lezat. Tempat untuk nongkrong gak jelas dengan fanta float, fried fries hingga tahu goreng. Huff,. Kapan cepat lulus ya, cepet pinter?
Ketika dunia terus berputar, aku masih berbicara dalam kelas speaking melakukan apa yang aku inginkan, mengeluarkan isi otakku. Lembayung senja tak berwarna jingga kerena mendung, melainkan nuansa violet dan mega-mega merah dibayangi langit gelap. Lampu kota mulai menyala dan suara adzan bersahutan dari masjid- masjid sekitar. Mulutku komat-kamit menjawab adzan. Saatnya pulang.
Gelap. Tak hanya lampu-lampu kota yang menemaniku, bintang-bintang juga menerangiku dengan cahayanya yang lemah tertutup gemerlapnya dunia. Tonight, I just wanna take a walk. Sesekali menoleh dengan teman seperjalananku kali ini. Seorang wanita yang beberapa tahun lebih tua dariku, salah seorang wanita tangguh yang pernah kutemui dibalik kekurangannya atas nama seorang manusia. I wish, may you happy whole your life, Miss,..
Kami bercerita sepanjang perjalanan pulang. Angin memang menerpa jilbabku, tapi ia tak cukup tangguh merusaknya. Sesekali angkutan ini berhenti untuk menaikkan penumpang sebelum tujuan akhirnya adalah terminal. Tanpa sengaja aku berbalik dan melihat seorang penumpang, keren!. Aku ingin melihat wajahnya sekali lagi, tapi laki-laki itu menolak, memalingkan wajahnya memandangi deretan pertokoan disepanjang jalan. seakan berkata. “Jangan pandangi aku dengan mata nafsumu gadis. Atau kerlingan matamu bisa membangkitkan desiran darah mudaku ini.” Dan hatiku membenarkannya. “kamu benar, maaf! ” aku tersenyum kecil.
Aku menoleh pada Guruku yang menceritakan kehidupannya, hidup sendiri bersama seorang ibu tua dan sebagai wanita lajang dengan hasrat ingin menikah. Aku tersenyum. Doaku dalam hati ketika beliau turun adalah, hati-hati dikehidupanmu, semoga lekas dapat jodoh yang baik miss,.
Terminal begitu lenggang, wajar ini sudah larut malam. Aku menggambil tempat duduk di diantara para ibu-ibu yang berwajah letih menanti bus,bapak-bapak yang rindu dengan anaknya, seorang pengemis tua yang yang tadi pagi mengemis di pengajian murid Almarhum kyai Asrrori, pengamen –pengamen bus antar kota, juga preman yang berasal dari desa sebelah yang wajahnya sangat familiar denganku. Pada pertemuanku sebelumnya dengannya, dia memperkenalkan diri sebagai murid dari kakek ku sewaktu di madrasah dulu. Dia tersenyum padaku.
“Tumben nduk”
Aku menjawab dengan senyuman.
“lek jare pak guru biyen, sopo seng lenggah paling anteng, iku sing oleh mole disik” dia menoleh padaku dan tersenyum lebar dengan gigi ompongnya “lenggah sing anteng!”
Aku melebarkan senyumanku padanya.
Dia berteriak diantara keramaian pengamen yang bernyanyi sendiri. Andai aku bisa request lagu, Plain white T’s yang judulnya Hey there Delilah!
Tak lama bis datang.
Aku menggangukkan kepala tanda perpisahan pada preman itu, aku memberinya nama “Untitled” karena dia tidak pernah memberitahu namanya padaku.”Dulu” katanya, “mbahmu sering meludahi muridnya yang nakal, yang tidur saat pelajaran dengan ludah bau seorang perokok berat. Rupanya hukuman itu belum cukup untuk membuatku belajar. Harusnya kau suruh mbahmu bawa kayu rotan untuk memukulku”
Aku tersenyum geleng kepala. Aku mengerti maksudmu pak. Mengingatkanku pada puisi lama sewaktu madrasah
Aku lalai dipagi hari
Beta lengah dimasa muda
Kini hidup meracun hati
Miskin ilmu, Miskin harta
Kini aku sudah besar, sudah mampu mengartikan sebuah puisi dari pemaknaan hermenetik dan herestiknya. Aku juga bisa memahami lagu yang dibawakan pengamen didalam bus ini. Yang mengisahkan kerinduan seorang kekasih yang mendalam akan tawa manja kekasihnya. Touchy.
Aku meloncat turun dari bus tepat didepan gapura desaku. Rupanya langit sayang padaku, hujan tidak turun malam ini. Perjalanan malam memang selalu istimewa dan tak pernah biasa. Setidaknya, untuk mengisi diary-ku malam ini.
Jumat, 26 Februari 2010
Stopped by Sniper
A woman, named Khadijaa, she was about last twentiest years old, walked among the corpses in the sharp breezing wind of winter. her mouth’s muttering over to her self with shaking hands, her face looked pale and dirty, she tried to regcognize her husband among the corpses. She could only try to be patient, calm her fears and wish her husband was not one of the them.
While she replayed again her memory about her self that she was brought up from her motherland, Indonesia ten years ago to America then suffering here, the holy land of Palestine. Then, some jews troop stoped her steps, crossed his hand on his square chest and asked her.
An eye’s watching them inside a car
“Hey lady, where do you wanna go? This area is danger for you!”
“I’m looking for my husband” her voice was almost unheard
“Husband?? Who’s your husband?”
“Dr. Ayman, Dr. Ayman Boshnaf.”
“Dr. Ayman Boshnaf?” his eyes shooted the woman fiercely.
“Yeah, do you know where is he?”
“No, but you’d better get out of this area, it’s too dangerous for you.”
“This land have been already dangerous since jews came, and you know what, I will never go, untill I found out my husband”. She barked at the troop.
“Don’t let me force you lady,..” the troop noticed her.
“Try me, I am not such coward lady!!”
The troop bent his body toward the woman. “If I could do something, why not?”
The troop throught the woman harsly to the ground, and forced her to move. Tanks was parked on the street. Soldiers with green combat dressed moving all arround were carrying the guns and bending to her. The woman screamed aloud.
Suddenly, a white car stoped and a doctor appeared, he wore a white coat marked his name as Dr. Jurnalis and his organisation, MER-C Indonesia, The doctor talked to the troops.
“Hey! Wait a minute!” He shouted to the troops
Dr. Jurnalis is Indonesian, graduated from American university. He and Dr. Ayman Boshnaf came Palestine trough ISMA, International Solidarity Movement of America as volunteer doctor. But after arrived in Palestine, mostly, he worked with MER-C Indonesia.
“She is foreigner, me too, and her presence here is guaranted by ISMA. Her husband is doctor, so you may not touch this woman at all! World people will consider it as outraged of human right abuses.” the doctor noticed the Israeli troops. One shrug his shoulder when another saw each others.
“so, just let her with me. It’s not that easy to kill this woman after all held international citizenship solidarity conference to Palestinian” Dr jurnalist emphasized.
The captain toke a deep breath “well, have a nice journey lady” the soldier nodded his head to her. His smiling was broad.
“And keep away from danger area!” he touched his hat with the tip of his fingers and let them go.
Then the doctor took the worried woman and brought her inside the car. But the woman couldn’t hide her curiousity.
“Doctor, are you indonesian? Me too. My name is Khadijaa” she introduced her self to Dr. Jurnalis.
“How do you know about My husband? ISMA? Have you ever met him? Please..”
Dr. Jurnalis smiled at glance.
“Let me check your condition first ma’am” he tooks few little treatment and check her wrist. Then he looked Khadijaa deeply. “Are you,…??”
“I’m fine.” She took her wrist and keep into her chest
“Ok, have you took your lunch?” he asked curiously
“I have doc!” she barked
“Mrs. Boshnaf, calm down. I know Dr. Ayman Boshnaf, he was with us 2 days ago and told much about you when he knew that I’m Indonesian. but he left us after heard his village, beer sheva was attacked by israel. So he went out there.” Dr. Jurnalist Explained clearly.
“And I suggest you ma’am, don’t go there now, it’s danger, don’t you listen that troops said?” he convinced Mrs. Boshnaf.
“No, I have to go doctor!” Mrs. Boshnaf said surely.
“Please, postpone your willing to go there” Dr. jurnalis still tried to hold her on the car.
“But I have to, I have been waiting for this moment for years, I have to meet him!” her eyes almost full with tears.
“Okay, listen! usually they shoot at your feet, your head, or to the ground in front of you. Don’t you run or lie on the ground or you will be a good target. Stay stand up, and then, they will be afraid. Okay? Take care your self, Allah hafidz!”
They huged each other before leaving.
The lady walked alone, many corpses every where. she seemed to hold her breath, inhaled, relieved every time she saw a corpse rampant in the road side and recited prayer every moment.
“Ai Me,..where are you, don’t you hear my voice? I call you, where are you?.” She tore and wishpered to her self.
Then she saw a boy cries behind the can he’s scared and his mother was killed by jews troops. They suspected that his father is one of Hamas Soldier and his mother didn’t want to tell them where was the Hamas’s camp located, they left that boy alone, crying his mother death. Khadijaa tried to get close to the boy, and asked him where’s his home, surprisingly, he told that he is from beer sheva. So she decided to carry the boy’s mother to go to the hospital.
Beer sheva is the most beautiful village in Gaza distric, border line between Palestine-Israel, and more peace than others. but since Israel heard that there are few Hamas activist in there, tanks and troops sieged the village. There were some reporters with camera and video arround. They were wearing protective helm and anti bullet jacket. Many houses and building was broken, people murdered and massacred. Khadijaa tried to reach up the hospital in ordered to meet her husband because she convinced that her husband must be there.
Khadijaa waved her hand when she saw her husband in open space of square was helping people.
“A…y me!!!!!”
Dr. Ayman turned arround and saw her wife running at him. He couldn’t stand up steady on his feet as if it is made of jelly, because of surprised. The corner of his eyes caught a sniper on the roof, watching khadijaa intently, got ready to fire.
Doo…..rrrrrr………………dorr…….
“Noooooooo,………….!!!!!!!!!!!!!.” Dr. Ayman run to her wife and caught her body.
“Ay me….” Her voice almost unheard, tears was melting before she closed her eyes forever
“Oh, Khadijaa,..” he huged her wife tightly.
At the moment, 29 israeli troops step closer, surround him, bundled him and tied his hands with plastic handcuffs. They take Dr. Ayman away from her dead wife. He almost cried of dissappointment
I WANT TO BE WITH MY WIFE!!!!!! He fought to run to his wife and escaped from the Israeli troops
Doo…..rrrrrr………………dorr…….
*** *** ***
In the car, Dr. Jurnalis kept silent and put his hand in his face, seems regrating about something.
“What happened Doc, you look sad, is it about Mrs. Boshnaf?”
“Yes, but it is something unbelievable!”
“What happen?” asked his assistant curiously.
“You will not believe me,..” he looked at his assistant deeply, “She is pregnant,…three months, I guess, she crossed the border line between egypt and palestine to catch up her husband untill here, because she want to tell her husband that she is pregnant”
“Oh,..” he put his palms to cover his face. Sadly.
No voice at that car for a moment except the mechines, silent.
While she replayed again her memory about her self that she was brought up from her motherland, Indonesia ten years ago to America then suffering here, the holy land of Palestine. Then, some jews troop stoped her steps, crossed his hand on his square chest and asked her.
An eye’s watching them inside a car
“Hey lady, where do you wanna go? This area is danger for you!”
“I’m looking for my husband” her voice was almost unheard
“Husband?? Who’s your husband?”
“Dr. Ayman, Dr. Ayman Boshnaf.”
“Dr. Ayman Boshnaf?” his eyes shooted the woman fiercely.
“Yeah, do you know where is he?”
“No, but you’d better get out of this area, it’s too dangerous for you.”
“This land have been already dangerous since jews came, and you know what, I will never go, untill I found out my husband”. She barked at the troop.
“Don’t let me force you lady,..” the troop noticed her.
“Try me, I am not such coward lady!!”
The troop bent his body toward the woman. “If I could do something, why not?”
The troop throught the woman harsly to the ground, and forced her to move. Tanks was parked on the street. Soldiers with green combat dressed moving all arround were carrying the guns and bending to her. The woman screamed aloud.
Suddenly, a white car stoped and a doctor appeared, he wore a white coat marked his name as Dr. Jurnalis and his organisation, MER-C Indonesia, The doctor talked to the troops.
“Hey! Wait a minute!” He shouted to the troops
Dr. Jurnalis is Indonesian, graduated from American university. He and Dr. Ayman Boshnaf came Palestine trough ISMA, International Solidarity Movement of America as volunteer doctor. But after arrived in Palestine, mostly, he worked with MER-C Indonesia.
“She is foreigner, me too, and her presence here is guaranted by ISMA. Her husband is doctor, so you may not touch this woman at all! World people will consider it as outraged of human right abuses.” the doctor noticed the Israeli troops. One shrug his shoulder when another saw each others.
“so, just let her with me. It’s not that easy to kill this woman after all held international citizenship solidarity conference to Palestinian” Dr jurnalist emphasized.
The captain toke a deep breath “well, have a nice journey lady” the soldier nodded his head to her. His smiling was broad.
“And keep away from danger area!” he touched his hat with the tip of his fingers and let them go.
Then the doctor took the worried woman and brought her inside the car. But the woman couldn’t hide her curiousity.
“Doctor, are you indonesian? Me too. My name is Khadijaa” she introduced her self to Dr. Jurnalis.
“How do you know about My husband? ISMA? Have you ever met him? Please..”
Dr. Jurnalis smiled at glance.
“Let me check your condition first ma’am” he tooks few little treatment and check her wrist. Then he looked Khadijaa deeply. “Are you,…??”
“I’m fine.” She took her wrist and keep into her chest
“Ok, have you took your lunch?” he asked curiously
“I have doc!” she barked
“Mrs. Boshnaf, calm down. I know Dr. Ayman Boshnaf, he was with us 2 days ago and told much about you when he knew that I’m Indonesian. but he left us after heard his village, beer sheva was attacked by israel. So he went out there.” Dr. Jurnalist Explained clearly.
“And I suggest you ma’am, don’t go there now, it’s danger, don’t you listen that troops said?” he convinced Mrs. Boshnaf.
“No, I have to go doctor!” Mrs. Boshnaf said surely.
“Please, postpone your willing to go there” Dr. jurnalis still tried to hold her on the car.
“But I have to, I have been waiting for this moment for years, I have to meet him!” her eyes almost full with tears.
“Okay, listen! usually they shoot at your feet, your head, or to the ground in front of you. Don’t you run or lie on the ground or you will be a good target. Stay stand up, and then, they will be afraid. Okay? Take care your self, Allah hafidz!”
They huged each other before leaving.
The lady walked alone, many corpses every where. she seemed to hold her breath, inhaled, relieved every time she saw a corpse rampant in the road side and recited prayer every moment.
“Ai Me,..where are you, don’t you hear my voice? I call you, where are you?.” She tore and wishpered to her self.
Then she saw a boy cries behind the can he’s scared and his mother was killed by jews troops. They suspected that his father is one of Hamas Soldier and his mother didn’t want to tell them where was the Hamas’s camp located, they left that boy alone, crying his mother death. Khadijaa tried to get close to the boy, and asked him where’s his home, surprisingly, he told that he is from beer sheva. So she decided to carry the boy’s mother to go to the hospital.
Beer sheva is the most beautiful village in Gaza distric, border line between Palestine-Israel, and more peace than others. but since Israel heard that there are few Hamas activist in there, tanks and troops sieged the village. There were some reporters with camera and video arround. They were wearing protective helm and anti bullet jacket. Many houses and building was broken, people murdered and massacred. Khadijaa tried to reach up the hospital in ordered to meet her husband because she convinced that her husband must be there.
Khadijaa waved her hand when she saw her husband in open space of square was helping people.
“A…y me!!!!!”
Dr. Ayman turned arround and saw her wife running at him. He couldn’t stand up steady on his feet as if it is made of jelly, because of surprised. The corner of his eyes caught a sniper on the roof, watching khadijaa intently, got ready to fire.
Doo…..rrrrrr………………dorr…….
“Noooooooo,………….!!!!!!!!!!!!!.” Dr. Ayman run to her wife and caught her body.
“Ay me….” Her voice almost unheard, tears was melting before she closed her eyes forever
“Oh, Khadijaa,..” he huged her wife tightly.
At the moment, 29 israeli troops step closer, surround him, bundled him and tied his hands with plastic handcuffs. They take Dr. Ayman away from her dead wife. He almost cried of dissappointment
I WANT TO BE WITH MY WIFE!!!!!! He fought to run to his wife and escaped from the Israeli troops
Doo…..rrrrrr………………dorr…….
*** *** ***
In the car, Dr. Jurnalis kept silent and put his hand in his face, seems regrating about something.
“What happened Doc, you look sad, is it about Mrs. Boshnaf?”
“Yes, but it is something unbelievable!”
“What happen?” asked his assistant curiously.
“You will not believe me,..” he looked at his assistant deeply, “She is pregnant,…three months, I guess, she crossed the border line between egypt and palestine to catch up her husband untill here, because she want to tell her husband that she is pregnant”
“Oh,..” he put his palms to cover his face. Sadly.
No voice at that car for a moment except the mechines, silent.
THE MEETING
It happened some time in early 2000. It was a busy day for the students of the muslim girl boarding school because boys came from their dorms to build the girl’s rooms. It was abnormal usually, that boys came to the girl’s dorm, but it was the exception, in contrary, girls just tried to dress up as beautifull as they could just for flattering at those boys. The girls seemed never seen boys before so that they made over their appearance. but for Nali, it was same like usually. wheather boys came or not, nothing change to her life, she still had to memorize arabic vocabs, witir, and imrithi . She sighed breath deeply.
Then, when she was walking to the dorm, a sound of boy shouted at her.
“li, take the backet!”
She didn’t care for a moment, just kept silent and still stood up in her place, the question in her mind was how come he knew my name? suddenly, a boy came and took the backet near her. Nali could see his innocent face at glance and his wink embarrassed her. Her abash face became redish.
“Ali, don’t tease that girl” another sound shouted at them, then he left her. Nali back to the dorm and kept a name inside her heart, Ali, the name which she always recite every single time she remember of her childhood in boarding school.
Years passed later, Nali rised up became a young lady, not a high school girl anymore. Many things have been changed from her life but named of Ali has its own place in her heart as love at the first sight. The love never has been spoken, no fancy rendezvous meeting even Nali didn’t know where ali came from. The love was being an oblivious thing by the time.
Ramadzan 20th 2009, By an invitation by friend of her, Nali came to a reunion of Al-Azar Egypt students. Only men were gathering, and she was the only woman there. Ashame, strange and fool were she felt at the moment. But she tried to be as normal as possible and mingle with the boys. While she was talking with them, 2 men came late and took a seat in front of Nali. Nali was suddenly surprised by a man. It was Ali, A man who winked at her 10 years ago when she was child, and his friend.
Nali’s heart fluttered, remembering her memory, but she felt that she must speak, she greeted him.
“Aren’t you Ali, are you?”
Ali stood watching the stanger girl with enthusiasm, just kept smiling, but rather than surprise.
“Oh, yeah! I’m Ali, so may I know your name please..”
Nali wet her lips and smiled,
“I’m Nali, nice to meet you again”.
Once Ali looked at Nali and was about to say something, but then he decided not to. Ali did not speak for a while, he looked at the trees. It was exhausted for Nali to explain. But at the same time, Ali and Nali, they was going to speak together
Umm,…. Na,..A,…Li,..
“Howdy ?”, Ali said. Nali just laughed and answered simply, “Fine”. And they two laughed together, ignoring all the boys who were there.
“Well, Nali, so tell me how did you know my name?”. Ali asked curiousity
Realizing their friend was talking with the only one girl of them, they joint at Nali and Ali’s table. They drew their chair a little nearer to Nali and wanted to listen her favorably. But It was so embarrassed for her. Nali thought, it is not a good one to tell about your childhood love affair.
“This isn’t your trouble Nali, so come clean!”. One boy convinced her.
Finally, Nali told the story, how she knew aboout Ali, and she was calm enough to take care of their questions. Now, Nali knew where did Ali from and studied and decided to make a friend. And they still could keep in touch by technology.
Sounds of Adzan from the mousque nearby realized them to pray and broke their fast. Then, they went to masjid Jami’.
Nali thanked to the God, a little surprising thing in the great month of Ramadzan. Her tears almost fall down to her palms. She just saw a teology theory “Mysterium Tremendum” . Nali saw at the constellation of stars, feeling that God was not just a mirage . And one thing she learnt, if you are formed a pair with someone, no matter how far your life takes you away, you will meet him or her by destiny.
Then, when she was walking to the dorm, a sound of boy shouted at her.
“li, take the backet!”
She didn’t care for a moment, just kept silent and still stood up in her place, the question in her mind was how come he knew my name? suddenly, a boy came and took the backet near her. Nali could see his innocent face at glance and his wink embarrassed her. Her abash face became redish.
“Ali, don’t tease that girl” another sound shouted at them, then he left her. Nali back to the dorm and kept a name inside her heart, Ali, the name which she always recite every single time she remember of her childhood in boarding school.
Years passed later, Nali rised up became a young lady, not a high school girl anymore. Many things have been changed from her life but named of Ali has its own place in her heart as love at the first sight. The love never has been spoken, no fancy rendezvous meeting even Nali didn’t know where ali came from. The love was being an oblivious thing by the time.
Ramadzan 20th 2009, By an invitation by friend of her, Nali came to a reunion of Al-Azar Egypt students. Only men were gathering, and she was the only woman there. Ashame, strange and fool were she felt at the moment. But she tried to be as normal as possible and mingle with the boys. While she was talking with them, 2 men came late and took a seat in front of Nali. Nali was suddenly surprised by a man. It was Ali, A man who winked at her 10 years ago when she was child, and his friend.
Nali’s heart fluttered, remembering her memory, but she felt that she must speak, she greeted him.
“Aren’t you Ali, are you?”
Ali stood watching the stanger girl with enthusiasm, just kept smiling, but rather than surprise.
“Oh, yeah! I’m Ali, so may I know your name please..”
Nali wet her lips and smiled,
“I’m Nali, nice to meet you again”.
Once Ali looked at Nali and was about to say something, but then he decided not to. Ali did not speak for a while, he looked at the trees. It was exhausted for Nali to explain. But at the same time, Ali and Nali, they was going to speak together
Umm,…. Na,..A,…Li,..
“Howdy ?”, Ali said. Nali just laughed and answered simply, “Fine”. And they two laughed together, ignoring all the boys who were there.
“Well, Nali, so tell me how did you know my name?”. Ali asked curiousity
Realizing their friend was talking with the only one girl of them, they joint at Nali and Ali’s table. They drew their chair a little nearer to Nali and wanted to listen her favorably. But It was so embarrassed for her. Nali thought, it is not a good one to tell about your childhood love affair.
“This isn’t your trouble Nali, so come clean!”. One boy convinced her.
Finally, Nali told the story, how she knew aboout Ali, and she was calm enough to take care of their questions. Now, Nali knew where did Ali from and studied and decided to make a friend. And they still could keep in touch by technology.
Sounds of Adzan from the mousque nearby realized them to pray and broke their fast. Then, they went to masjid Jami’.
Nali thanked to the God, a little surprising thing in the great month of Ramadzan. Her tears almost fall down to her palms. She just saw a teology theory “Mysterium Tremendum” . Nali saw at the constellation of stars, feeling that God was not just a mirage . And one thing she learnt, if you are formed a pair with someone, no matter how far your life takes you away, you will meet him or her by destiny.
Langganan:
Postingan (Atom)